Deployment and Custody: Protecting Your Rights

Deploy Smart — Protect Your Custody

Deployment is a fact of military life. But without proper planning, it can become a weapon in a custody dispute. Here's how to protect your parenting rights before, during, and after deployment.

Before Deployment

File a Temporary Custody Order

Do this through the court BEFORE your deployment date. The order should:

Designate a temporary custodian for your parenting time (a trusted family member is ideal)
Specify that the arrangement is temporary and reverts upon your return
Include provisions for communication with your children during deployment
Be filed with the same court that handles your custody case

Create a Family Care Plan

The military requires a Family Care Plan for single parents and dual-military couples. Even if not required for your situation, create one that includes:

Who cares for your children during deployment
Financial arrangements (allotments, power of attorney for finances)
Medical authorization for the caregiver
School and activity information
Emergency contacts and procedures

Power of Attorney

Consider a limited power of attorney for your designated caregiver covering:

Medical decisions for your children
School enrollment and decisions
Day-to-day parenting decisions
Financial management for child-related expenses

Your JAG office can prepare this for free.

During Deployment

Maintaining Contact

Schedule regular video calls (work around time zones and operational tempo)
Write letters and send care packages
Use technology: shared photo albums, messaging apps, video messages
Ask your caregiver to keep you updated on school, activities, and health
Document all communication efforts — this matters for court

The SCRA Shield

If the other parent files for modification during your deployment:

The Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA) allows you to request a stay of proceedings
The stay must be at least 90 days
You get an additional 90-day grace period after returning
Courts cannot enter default judgment against you while deployed
Have your attorney (or JAG) file the SCRA request immediately if papers are served

What the Other Parent Cannot Do

File for and receive a custody modification without your participation (SCRA protects you)
Claim you "abandoned" the children due to military service
Use your deployment as sole evidence that you're an unfit parent

After Deployment

Reinstating Your Parenting Time

Upon return, your pre-deployment custody arrangement should be reinstated
If the other parent resists, file a motion immediately
Courts are required to revert to the pre-deployment status quo
Any temporary orders entered during deployment should expire upon your return

Dealing With Changed Circumstances

Sometimes things change during a long deployment:

Children may have adjusted to a new routine
The other parent may have established new patterns
Reintegration takes time — for you and your kids
Be patient with the transition while firmly asserting your legal rights

Common Pitfalls

Not getting pre-deployment orders: Without a court order, the other parent may argue the new status quo during deployment should continue
Relying on verbal agreements: Get everything in writing and filed with the court
Not keeping communication records: Document every call, letter, and package
Waiting too long after return: Reinstate your custody arrangement immediately upon return

Resources

Military OneSource: 1-800-342-9647 — deployment support, legal referrals, counseling
Stateside Legal: Free legal help for service members
Your installation JAG office: Free legal assistance for deployment preparation
Veterans Crisis Line: 988 press 1 — if reintegration is overwhelming

Next Steps

Contact your JAG office as soon as deployment orders are received
File a temporary custody order with the court
Create a comprehensive Family Care Plan
Set up communication tools and schedule before you leave
Document everything — your preparation shows the court you're a responsible parent